Bunny Love

I turned 27 today, which I cannot quite comprehend. I don't feel 27 at all. My dad got me a ticket to see Wicked, which I am totally stoked about. I've been wanting to see it since it came out in New York and since they're here all month it's the one thing I wanted for my birthday. He couldn't afford 2 tickets, so I'm going by myself, but it should still be good. Mum got me some nail polish and a Fluttershy.

It was a good birthday even though some plans got pushed aside and changed, so overall I'm happy.

elvensapphire and ladyminya thank you so much for the V-Gifts!!! ♥ ♥ ♥

Soooooo.... today I kinda found out that I'M GOING TO LAS VEGAS IN JUNE FOR MY BIRTHDAY AND ALSO GOING TO GO SEE 'LOVE'!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

LAS VEGAS.

A TRIP.

I'M GOING SOMEWHERE. LIKE, NOT LOCAL. HOLY SHIT. (it's my first real vacay since NY in 2003)

I GET TO GET A PASSPORT. I'VE NEVER HAD A PASSPORT BEFORE. THIS IS FUCKING AWESOME!!!!

And the best part? I DON'T HAVE TO PAY FOR AIR AND HOTEL!!!!!!!



I CAN GAMBLE MY LIFE AWAY!!! ;aslkdfua;lseu; sdlfksd;lfkj

....or not.

I GOT A SNOW CONE MAKER TODAY!!!! Twenty bucks at Wal-Mart! And it's pink. Mum and I just made Pepsi slushies. I also got a new pair of super light weight cotton PJ pants. I needed a new pair because it's been so hot out and the ones I did have kinda went boom. Like boom the way Jared's jeans went in the season two gag reel. Who knew bending down to pick up your cat would destroy a perfectly good pair of PJ bottoms?

The mall I went to also had a psychic fair on all week and today was the last day. When I got there I was deciding who to see (they have several different people with different mediums), and I was pretty sure I would go with a taro reading, but there was this nice woman, Maureen who was free right away and so I sat down with her. Whether you believe in that sort of thing or not it was a really interesting experience. She had some pretty accurate stuff to say. She wasn't like 'Your favourite colour is pink and you went to this high school' ect. She was more in tune with energies and auras and things like that. We talked about certain things and she said she got certain images in her mind. Nothing super specific, but she did say that she saw me in London at some point. If I was visiting or living there she didn't know, but I was just super stoked that she saw me in London. :D Here's something gremmie_goo will get; she asked me if I had an affinity to sheep and some sort of herding dog(s). That was kind of creepy and awesome.

I've almost finished reading Shadow's Return by Lynn Flewelling. I love it and I don't want to see it end. :( I'm also glad I took my time with it because I know I could have easily finished reading it in one big go. Now all I have to do is wait for the next book next year.

I'm re-watching the first two seasons of Battlestar Galactica. I just finished season one the other day. I can never get over how awesome and mind blowing this show is. I wish we didn't have to wait until next year for the second part of season 4, but at the same time I never want it to end.

Yesterday was my cousin's seventh birthday and my mum and I drove out to Delta to have a big family BBQ and visit (and to also get the rest of my birthday pressies). I met Liam, my newest cousin who is exactly four weeks old. He was just darling. But the best part is? He seems to have reddish blonde hair. No one except for me in the family has that hair colouring. It comes from my mum's side, but it doesn't show up that much. If his hair stays relatively the same colour then I won't be the only red head in the family.

You know when you're a kid and you think 'oh, I won't be that old for like 100 years' and then you blink and you're now that age? Yeah, that's kinda how I feel right now. I don't feel old or anything, but how the frak did I suddenly turn 24?!?!

*peeks in bed for Winchester's and Petrelli's* They must be on their way.

So there was bad communication between my dad and I about the appointment with the credit union on Tuesday, so I had to reschedule it for next Wednesday. I hope it won't take too long, because I have to register for the course as soon as I can.

I'm watching Happy Gilmore right now. I love this movie. The price is wrong, bitch.

Today I just kinda lazed about and didn't really do much. I did clean Hiro's fish tank, so I think he's happy about that. I also made dinner for mum and me. She bought this new burger seasoning mix so I made some yummy burgers.

Tomorrow I hope to get a haircut and then mum and I may go look at ice cream cakes and order one for my birthday. I'm not sure what to get this year. I would love to get naked Winchesters on it, but I don't know where the nearest erotic cake shop is. :P

I'm sure most of you know about Jared and Sandy breaking up and the wank that happened on ONTD about it. It makes me sad this whole stupid situation happened. It's their lives, not ours, so it's none of our business why they split. I just hope they find happiness. I'm sure there's going to be a surplus of J2 fics where Jensen comforts Jared about this whole situation. Ah, SPN fandom, you never fail to provide. I just wish it wasn't so bat shit crazy, otherwise I'd be in it a whole lot more.

Does anyone know how to grab video's off of hulu.com? Or is it even possible. I tried looking it up and seeing if there was a way, but I wasn't very successful.

I have the strong urge to play some video games, so I may do that after the movie. I'm thinking some Crash Bandicoot or Sonic.

I'd just like to thank everyone who sent me their love and thoughts over the past couple of days. They haven't been that great. I honestly thought I had a good shot at it and just felt so right about it. I guess I was wrong to keep my hopes up. Unfortunately the letter they sent was pretty vague, which means that there was nothing specific to as why I didn't get in. I'm going to try and find out why, but I won't hold my breath.

I keep going back and forth between emotions. Part of me is OK and knows I can try next year for the 2009/2010 course. But there's this other part of me that just feels like an utter failure and feels like I've let so many people down. For those of you who have known me on here for a long while know that mum and I haven't had it all that easy over the past few years, so I finally thought this was my shot at moving on with my life. To finally start something new. I partially feel ashamed as well, because I know that all my friends from high school and some co-workers I've know for a few years have gone through school and are now graduated. They're starting their lives and I feel left behind.

I think one of the worst things is that I put so much into this portfolio and tried so hard and now I can't even look at it because all I see at the moment is failure. Yes, I know that sounds a bit over dramatic, but for the moment it's true. I think I just need some time to process and digest it. I know my feelings about this will change in time and I may not be as hard on myself. Hell, it's only been two days.

Having said all this I do have some options. There's a ten week certificate course I can take over the summer that is like a mini version of the course I applied to, but unfortunately I cannot afford to take that much time off of work. I'd loose my benefits and there's no way I'd be able to pay the bills. With mum on temporary disability her income isn't as good as it was and we're barely scraping by as it is. There is one option is to get a loan from the bank, but I don't know if they'd give a student loan that small. The course itself is about $2000 and then I'd need about $1500-2000 for living expenses. I already know I can't get a regular loan because of the one I tried to get a few months ago and got shot down for that. What I may be able to do is do one or two weeks of the ten week course. I have some vacation hours and I can use them to fill the void for a week or two. There is a course I can take in the fall over 8 weeks or something like that, so I already know I'm going to do that.

Dad and I had a fight over it earlier today and I just ended up having a breakdown. Mum had to try and keep me quiet because I was ranting and screaming kinda loud. Dad doesn't get how tight our money is and thinks I'm just making excuses not to do this summer program. I know he means well and he loves me, but he just doesn't understand. He has a habit of wanting to help and give advice, but in the process make you feel like a total shit and failure. We're going to talk and I'm going to try and make him realize that even with cutting costs and everything it's just not feasible with the way things are at the moment. I mean I'll still try, but sometimes things cannot be worked in your favour.

I took yesterday off of work because I just couldn't put on my 'happy face' and deal with customers. I had to go to the mall and mail something and mum took me for dinner at the food court and then some window shopping. We met a nice parrot in the pet shop named Pidge and he could meow like a cat. I think he has an identity crisis.

Speaking of cats there is one little bright spot that happened to mum and me. We got a flier in the mail earlier this week about a new vet office opening up and they were having an open house and giving out free examinations and vaccinations. How awesome is that? Moe and Tinkerbell were due for their shots and we've been worrying about it because we couldn't afford another vet visit and vaccination. I only had to work in the morning so mum (but some god given miracle) was able to get BOTH of them in their carriers and in the car to take them to the vets. How cool is that? Poor Moe was freaked out, but he got his boosters and rabies shot. Tinkerbell didn't get her shots because the vet didn't want to give them to her because her abscess was still healing. She did give her a shot of antibiotics and some more drops to put on to get rid of it. We bring her back in a week or so to get her booster shots and the vet said since we couldn't get the free vaccination today she'll give them on the house next time. Even though I had to pay $80 for a free visit it was still a great deal.

Tomorrow mum and I may see a movie or may not. We're debating between Iron Man or Indy if we do go out.

Tonight I was lazy and mopy and I ordered pizza and watched the first X-Files movie. I hadn't watched it in so long and gah! Love them. It was the first movie I ever saw more than two times in the theatres. And I totally forgot that Locke was in it and went Boom!

I also realized that my birthday is in less than a month. o.O I've been so wrapped up in everything that I'd forgotten. *cough*wishlist*cough*

Oh, and Who would you ship me with?

......

Holy crap.

*cough* Anyway, my mommy wrote me a message...on my arm.

Holy crap, it's June. How'd that happen? I've been so preoccupied with other things I just realized today that my birthday is in 2 weeks. o.O That kind freaked me out. *cough*wishlist*cough*

The Canadian dollar is at $0.94 US. I really wish I could go down to the states and shop, especially Target, because I haven't been to Target since I was about 11 or 12. Dear Target, come to Canada. Kthnx.

I'm honestly amazed at how well Tinkerbell is doing. It's almost like she was born here, she's just moved herself right in. She loves to be outside and loves chasing bugs. Her and Eowyn still avoid each other, so they haven't really bonded. They may never get really friendly or they could become best buds. It hasn't even been a week yet, so we've got time. She snuck out the other night and ended up about 3 feet away from a raccoon. Gave me a heart attack, but luckily the raccoon didn't really care (it was one of the babies from last year) and didn't do anything. I just picked her up and threw her inside. Tink seems to have some outdoor sense (the shelter said she was a stray), but she needs some 'non kitty' animal sense.

This icon is seriously providing me with way too much joy. I just cannot stop looking at it and cracking up.

This past week has been rough ( cut for venting )

Hopefully next week will be the last week of school for me. My teacher just kept giving me project after project and I really started to feel like I'll never get it done. Right now I have one project left and then when I'm done that then I'm done. Done with high school. Done with feeling like I wasn't as good as my friends when I was in school because I didn't graduate with a full diploma. I'm 22 years old (23 in two weeks - holy crap) and on June 27th I'll officially be graduated. gremmie_goo said she would come to the ceremony and that means so much, because even though I had 'friends' when I graduated in 2002 it didn't really mean much. Even though Goo and I didn't go to school together having her there will make it more personal and fun. Oh, and my mum and dad will be there as well. LOL Of course they'll be there. I put them through hell with school. Depression reared it's ugly head and I just couldn't cope. Some days I couldn't even function or do anything. Going to school some days was like I was going to my execution. That's how powerful it was and how damaging. I didn't do drugs. I didn't get in trouble. I wasn't bullied. I didn't get horrible marks (when I was there), it was just the fact that I would miss days, weeks and sometimes even months of school at a time. Because I wasn't there I just freaked out at how behind I was and it just made everything worse. It was a vicious cycle.

I also didn't feel like I could be me. The Internet is really the first place that I've felt free to express who I really am and what ii'm about and to see how many people I've met and have become friends with has boggled my mind. I didn't think I'd ever have people who wanted to be friends with me because of who I truly am. I guess I was wrong.

Thinking back now I think I should have dropped out for a year or two, gotten my shit together and then go back. But that didn't happen, this is the way it happened and now I'm almost done and I can get this monkey off my back.

Wow, I don't think I've ever really gone into that much detail on here about when I was in high school.

Now I feel like I want to lock this post, but I don't think I will. I am who I am and if you don't like it then you can go somewhere else.

It looks as if all this LJ drama has calmed down. I'm not going to go into a lot about what I thought and such, all I will say is that LJ's heart is in the right place, but I think they should have done a little thinking and/or research before they just started deleting journals and causing a mass panic.

I want to go away this summer. I haven't been to the cabin in over two years which is the longest I've ever been away from it. Right now I don't even know if it's still standing. LOL Dad said he'll get us over there hell or high water. All I want to do is sit on the deck and read and read and read (and other things). I'm so burnt out. I need to get away. That's one of the things I love about the cabin. No electricity. No running water (ok, that I don't love as much). No phones, cars, roads ect. No anything. I can just sit on the deck or beach or whatever and do whatever the hell I want.

After 5 years here on LJ, I think I want to change my user name. Nothing drastic, but it figures the user name I want is taken! I hate that. And to make it more frustrating it looks as if they haven't updated their journal in almost a year (ironically the last entry posted was on my birthday). I dunno. I guess I'll just keep the one I have, or I'll see if I can contact the person and if they are still reachable maybe we could work something out.

I really want some Ben and Jerry's Half Baked ice cream. Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmm ice cream.

I also need a hair cut.

I made a bunch of Heroes icons and posted them over at bunny_icons

Fuck, this entry was long. If you read it then... uh... *hands you a bottle of booze*

Wednesday was my grandma's 90th birthday. Honestly? None of us thought she'd hit 90, but here we are. We went down to have cake and stuff and she seemed to enjoy it. Afterwards mum and I had dinner at my aunts and it was nice. We haven't seen anyone since... Christmas I think, so it was a change. I also talked to my great aunt (she lives in California) whom I haven't talked to since I was about 13. Scary how time goes by.

Yesterday was my first day back at work since Coda and I was alright. I wasn't quite with it, but I didn't burn anyone (or myself), so that's a plus. When I first came in an told S what happened I cried, but thankfully I didn't lose it in front of any customers. That would have been embarrassing. So far I haven't lost my cool with any customer, although there are some times that I'd really like to.
ove rall I'm doing alright, not great, but alright. It hasn't even been a week yet and in some ways it feels like it happened 100 years ago and then sometimes it feels like just one day. Eowyn still seems alright, she's been bouncing around and all that. I'm sure she's figured it out by now (either that or she's more of a blonde than I thought).

It's scary how much celebrity pictures are air brushed. I mean we all know it, but then when you see the original versus the finished one it's amazing. Some of those pictures are perfect just as is, but of course Hollywood frowns on things like wrinkles, freckles (except Jensen's), moles, saggy skin, flab, pudge, small boobs ect. Bah. Stupid media.

I don't want to go to work tomorrow, but at least I know that after tomorrow's shift I get a week off. I asked to have it off because I have 14 art assignments to finish. Most of them are easy and not hard, but they just take time. I'm just happy I have enough vacation hours that with the ones I'll be using next week I'll still have over a week worth of vacation to use.

I have successfully watched every episode of Gilmore Girls that has ever aired. :D Now I can watch all the new eppys when they air and if there is a season 8 then I can watch that.

Rainbow Brite on DVD!!! :D